After
by Nimbles
Summary: Alternate universe in which Naruto and Sasuke died in their final fight at the Final Valley. Story follows both Kakashi and Sakura trying to cope with after. Epilogue Included
1. Chapter 1

**Hello peeps! This is my first fanfiction story EVER! So enjoy!**

 **DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT own any of the characters involved in the story. The characters belong to Masashi Kishimoto, so don't sue me.**

 **Chapter 1:**

 **Kakashi's POV**

 _Rain_

My old friend once said at his father's and other Leaf citizens' funeral that the heavens were weeping on that dreadful day the funeral was held; after the Leaf village was attacked. Many lives were lost that day, but it wasn't the only tragic event we faced. No, there were other countless times we faced tragedy, some worst than others. Like today, The Fourth Great Shinobi War has ended about four days ago. In those four days, we had to pick ourselves up from wherever we were tossed and try to fix the leftover pieces of our broken lives that we like to call reality. Four days it took to gather our dead and have them buried. Four days it took to have headstones made for the lives that were taken by the hatred our world gives off.

Four days _since_ two of my students died.

Heck, it still feels like it was yesterday, few hours even. The wound is still raw, of course, like the other wounds various people are feeling now.

It's raining now, it reminds me of when it was raining when Rin died, and when I discovered my father's deceased body. Were the heavens weeping then too? If so, why didn't they weep for other people like Minato Sensei, Kushina Uzumaki, and the thousands of other lives lost throughout the years? I believed, that the heavens were not weeping back then, and when it rained, it just only rained. I believed if the heavens **could** weep for those who have fallen, it would be raining every day.

But now standing among the recognizable nameless faces, in the rain at the village cemetery, I do believe the heavens are weeping, at least for now. Many have umbrellas covering their faces, many like me, don't. We let the rain cover the tears that we cannot hold back. The war is over, peace has finally been achieved, but what good is peace when there's an unbearable pain in our chests, gnawing at us at every chance it gets. Every time I close my eyes, I keep remembering what happened in the war, and what happened _after_. _After_ is the hardest part that I cannot get out of my head. _After_ is when I saw not just one, but **two** of the war's heroes fade away.

 _After_

 _Sakura and I (Sakura practically carried me) were rushing over to the Final Valley where we expected Leaf's number one knuckleheaded ninja and the last heir of the Uchiha clan to be. They met there, supposedly to settle their differences once and for all. If Naruto won, I assume Sasuke will come back, and if Sasuke did, well..I'm not sure about that, Naruto did fight tooth and bone to get to Sasuke's level, and I bet my life he will not lose his pace now._

 _Jumping from tree to tree, I could feel Sakura's heartbeat and how anxious she feels to see them again, desperately hoping Naruto came out the victor. She knows she'll have to heal those two once we get there, but she's prepared for that; she's prepared for everything. Once we stepped into the clearing of the trees, I could see the statues of Hashirama Senju and Madara Uchiha, fallen and broken up. However, their hands made the unison sign, and atop of the sign, I could make out two unmoving bodies. Half of their bodies black, most likely from the Chidori and Rasengan they were told_ _ **not**_ _to use against each other. Sakura gasped at the scene, her right hand subconsciously squeezed my arm as her heart rate rose._

 _"It's okay, go on ahead," I told Sakura, removing my arm from her shoulders._

 _She only nodded in response as she made her way down towards the boys. Once she got to them, she went on her knees and immediately started her medical ninjutsu on Naruto. She hesitated when she put her hands on his chest, I could see that she did from all the way up here. Despite losing my sharingan, I can see Sakura hesitated, but I'm not sure why she did. A chilling thought crossed my mind, but I quickly dispelled the thought, it held doubts for two of my students. I sat on the ground, waiting to hear Sakura's cries of joys, Naruto's jokes, and Sasuke's silence. However, as the minutes flown by the only sounds I could hear were the birds chirping, and the only thing I could see was Sakura still hovering over her two stubborn teammates. The only difference: she was shaking frantically._

 _'I need to get down there!' I thought as the chilling thought, yet again, entered my mind. Sadly this time, it wasn't going away. I shakily stood up and looked down at where my students were. For someone who's as injured as me, it looked like a long way down. I swallowed my reluctance and jumped._

 _The instant I landed, I crumbled to the ground, swearing in pain. I hoped I regret jumping down to them. I hoped this sick feeling that's increasing with every breath I take will go away. I hoped to hear Naruto's lighthearted laughter as he teases Sakura and me for being worried about him and Sasuke. I hoped….._

 _I turned towards the three of them, several feet away._

 _"S-Sakura." I croaked out, pain coursing through my body. Man, that was a hard jump._

 _Of course, she didn't hear me. In fact, she didn't notice I was here, too distracted at the task at hand. I wouldn't want to bother her, but I can't erase this old, ugly feeling inside of me, and I needed her to. I sat up on my elbows, grimacing in pain ( not the first time), and cleared my throat, as I called out to her again._

 _"Sakura!" My voice was louder this time, no doubt she heard me._

 _At the sound of her name, she quickly looks over at me, startled expression clouding her face. It wasn't the only thing on her face, that was seen. Her emerald eyes were drowning in unshed tears. It wasn't the first time I saw her with tears threatening to break the dam in her green orbs, but it was the first time I saw something in those piercing eyes that I know wasn't there before: despair. Her eyes were crying out for help, to help her see something she wanted or feared to see._

 _"Kakashi Sensei," Sakura whispered so quietly, I would have doubted she said something in the first place if I didn't see her lips moved._

 _I swallowed the lump that was unknowingly forming in my throat. "Are they okay?" I nodded towards the two unmoving shinobi behind her._

 _Sakura blinked, a few tears escaping her sockets before she viciously wiped her eyes and took a deep breath. "Their….uh..chakras are, um..depleted, so it's going to take awhile before they…..can come around." She stumbled on her words, making them up as she went along. She knew too well she was lying to me. Sakura wasn't the best of liars, not to me, others, or herself. I nodded anyway at her sentence, playing along with her little lie. They weren't just chakra depleted, but I hoped she could fix them._

 _I laid on my back, giving my elbows a rest. I closed my eyes, listening out for the distinctive, loud, obnoxious voice I wished so badly to hear again. The only sounds I could make out, however, were the medical ninjutsu and birds. Birds….they don't sound like they did before I jumped down. The birds before sounded much happier, the ones now, they don't sound anything remotely to the upbeat chirps, just dreadful. I opened my eyes and was shocked to see but_ _ **one black crow**_ _, perched on a broken piece of whichever statue part. I learned a long time ago that crows can represent a lot of things ranging from magic to wisdom, and even war. A crow can also represent…._ _ **death**_ _. A chill ran through my body as I stared at the crow, while the crow stared at my students._

 _'No, please be a sign of good luck. Please be a sign of good fortune.' I wished loudly in my mind, but as the bird became silent and finally turned towards me, I knew my wish wouldn't come true. Although I have to see for myself what I feared, the stupid bird_ _ **must**_ _be wrong._

 _I closed my eyes, trying to sense all four chakra signatures, but I could only sense two: Sakura's and my one's. My eyes snapped opened in panic. I tried to stand up and make my way towards the three shinobi, but my exhausted body objected to that. Instead, I willed my body to crawled and crawled it did until I finally reached my goal. Sakura was still shakily healing up the two boys, but as I came closer to the scene; I knew it was too late._ _ **We**_ _were too late._

 _Half of Naruto's and Sasuke's body were all red, destroyed by whatever ninjutsu they used against one another. Their faces are barely recognizable, but I can still make out a faint smile on Naruto's face. He had won, one way or another, he got Sasuke to see things from a clearer perspective and understand that Naruto will never give up on things including him. I just wish they didn't take it too far. I remembered Naruto saying to Sasuke back at the Five Kage Summit when they both agreed to fight again later; he wouldn't mind dying because that would mean they would be free of being a jinchurki and an Uchiha. Now they are. They lay very still, perhaps they had died just a few minutes ago. Or maybe an hour ago, who knows? All I know is her medical ninjutsu wasn't working to revive the dead._

 _I put my hand on one of Sakura's shoulder, partially using it to balance myself. "Sakura," I said gently, hoping my voice won't break, just as my body was threatening to. "Sakura, it-it's too late. They're gone now, Sakura." My words had no effect on her, she continued to try harder to heal the deceased heroes, more tears slipping from her eyes._

 _"No!" She whispered louder than before. "No, they can't be. I can still save them! I know I can! I'm the apprentice to Lady Tsunade! I'm stronger! I can do-" Sakura cut herself off, breaking into sobs. Her never ending tears cascading down her face._

 _"Sakura" I pulled her into my embrace, my arms stroking her hair and back. For awhile she stood still, before she gave in, sobbing loudly and holding onto me for dear life._

 _"They're gone!" She painfully cried out in between her sobs. "They're both gone! I could've saved them! If only I was here earlier! If only I could've convinced Sasuke to love me enough to not leave again! Or if only I didn't make Naruto promise me-"_

 _"Shhh, please Sakura. Please stop talking, just please." I pleaded with her, a few of my own tears disobeying my order, falling steadily. I held her tighter, as her sobs increased. I couldn't bear hearing her regrets, as they clashed with my own. If only_ _ **I**_ _was there for them more. If only_ _ **I**_ _wasn't as injured as I am now. If only_ _ **I**_ _was stronger, and stop my students from killing each other._

 _If only._


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2:**

I shuddered at the memory of what happened _after_ the war. If I knew that was to come _after_ , I would've wanted the war to last forever.

I looked around at the numerous people in attendance, morbid faces matching my own. Among them, I see Hinata Hyuga standing out in the rain, her teammates, Kiba and Shino, standing on both of her sides. Poor Hinata, she's only sixteen years old, and already she had to fight in a war that killed both her cousin, Neji Hyuga, and the love of her life, Naruto Uzumaki. The saddest part about this tale is that she never knew how the guy who had inspired her the most felt in return; him having never responded to her love confession.

Other sad tales I noticed while skimming over the crowd: Shikamaru, Guy, Lee, Tenten, Tenzo, Ino…that's when I locked eyes with _her_ , standing beside Ino. Her wet pink bangs covering her forehead. It was only for a few seconds when we looked at one another, before she broke eye contact, turning around, leaving the memorial.

'Why is she leaving?' I wondered as I weaved my way through the crowd and towards her best friend.

I came up to Ino and observed her for a few seconds. Her face was dull, her eyes, leaking tears, were also lifeless like she's stuck in a trance. I don't blame her, I'm pretty sure I had that same look when my father died.

"Ino, where's Sakura?" I asked her, but she made no move to answer me, still gazing up ahead into the void of emptiness.

"Ino" I repeated louder this time. She doesn't hear me, yet someone else does.

Shikamaru, who was standing near her, his attention was caught. He moved his head towards us. For all that had happened these past days, Shikamaru looks the most composed. Nevertheless, I can tell behind that big brain of his, he's drowning in his regrets. 'What if I rescued Sasuke back in the rescued mission? What if I was there more by Naruto's side? What if I knew the headquarters wasn't safe, and I had a chance to save everyone? What if I **did** save everyone?

 _What if_

"Ino," He said, his voice coherent enough for her to snap out of her trance.

"Huh?" She looked at Shikamaru and he pointed in my direction. She turned towards me, finally noticing my presence. I nod at Shikamaru, silently thanking him. He nods back.

"Oh, I'm sorry Kakashi Sensei. I didn't see you there." Said Ino gravely.

I shrugged off the apology. "It's alright, do you know where Sakura is?"

Judging by her confused look she gave me, before looking around a few times; I can tell she didn't even notice her best friend left.

"It's okay," I reassured her. "I'll find her."

I started to leave when I heard Ino call out to me. I turn back.

"It's **not** okay, so please, don't lie to me or her when you see each other.

I nod in response and squeeze my way out of the crowd of lifeless people. It's still a bit hard moving around on my feet _after_ everything. Once I left, I start to close my eyes, so I can sense her familiar chakra, but I decide against it. I know where she is. I start to make my way towards the place where Team 7 became official, the training grounds.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3:**

 **Sakura's POV**

I drove my fist into a wooden post, at the training grounds where Team 7 passed the initiation test; pain shooting throughout my body. I'm not using my chakra while punching, although I usually do. I just want to feel another type of pain than the one in my heart.

'Why wasn't I strong enough!?'

My fist hits the post.

'Why wasn't I fast enough!'

Another fist into the post.

'Why did I let that blonde idiot make that promise to me!''

As my fist collided with the post, I can sense a familiar chakra, but I don't want to pay him any attention. He's on my blame list, right below my name.

"Sakura" He called out, I didn't, I **wouldn't** listen to him. I punched the post again.

"Sakura!" He said louder, but I punched harder. Hoping that I could drown his voice out if I punched the post harder and frequently.

'Why couldn't Sasuke believe me when I told him I loved him!'

 _Hit_

'Why couldn't those two listen to me?!'

A more painful hit came, blood breaking through my skin.

"Sakura!"

'Why wasn't I smart enough!'

 _Hit_

"SAKURA!"

"Why couldn't I be good enough! Why am I never good enough!" I screamed out.

 _Why_

I aggressively threw punches at the post; seeing only see red as my tears fell like the rain. I can feel someone grab my wrists, pulling me away from the wooden post.

"Sakura!" Kakashi shouted as I tried to wriggle my way out of his grasp. "Sakura please stop! You're hurting yourself!"

As if he cares. I force chakra to go to my hands, and push him off of me; my anger rising. He fell and look up at me in surprise.

"Do you even care?" I ask the masked man quietly. He only looked confusedly at me, not quite hearing my words. I repeated myself again.

"DO YOU EVEN CARE!? TWO OF YOUR STUDENTS ARE **DEAD**! DO YOU KNOW IT'S ON YOU?!"

"Sakura, listen-"

"NO! YOU LISTEN! IT'S YOUR FAULT NARUTO AND SASUKE ARE **GONE**! I HAVEN'T EVEN SEE YOU CRY FOR THEM! IF **YOU** ONLY WAS BETTER-" My voice faltered. No, I don't mean what I'm saying, so why am I saying it? I know who's at the real fault here, and I can't go blaming others, especially Kakashi Sensei.

"I-I'm sorry, I-I don't mean that," I said as I fell forward on my knees to the ground. Now more than ever, I can **_finally_** understand Sasuke and Naruto, their loneliness, sadness, and most of all, their pain. I can feel the ever present hole in my chest. Oh, how I wish for it to go away. How I wish for my physical pain to be more painful than my emotional. How I wish to see my two friends here. How I wish the sky will forever be dark like my heart is now.

 _How I wish_

"Why couldn't **I** be better!" I cried out. I buried my face into my hands as a fresh set of tears came rolling down. I want to stop crying, but I can't help it. "I'm so so sorry!"

"Sakura look at me. "Kakashi Sensei's calm voice told me, but I feel so disgusted with myself that I exploded at him, I became ashamed to look up. He doesn't deserve _this_.

There's nothing I could hear except my own cries and the rain. All of a sudden, I felt a hand grabbed my chin and made me forcibly look up at a set of dark eyes. The left eye, which held the sharingan once, is just like the right; except the left has a faint scar over it. It's funny because even without seeing the left eye for most of the time I have known him, his right one always had so much emotion. But now, none of his eyes do, I look away, feeling ashamed yet again.

"Look at me." He repeated. When did his voice get so cold? Has it always been that way?

"Sakura." I listened this time and look back at him.

He made sure we held eye contact before saying, "It isn't your fault, Sakura. None of this is. Let me take away your burden for you."

Is it that easy? Can I give my heavy heart to someone else? Upon thinking that, I know that's not possible. That's just another fairy tale story parents tell their children at night.

"No" My voice came out hoarse. "I won't let you do that, you carry too much already.

We stared at each other for what seems like forever.

"We should get out of the rain before we catch a cold," I mumbled, and he nods in agreement. I wiped away my tears then stood up. I looked back down at my teacher, he wouldn't get up. He continued to stare at me, he doesn't look like the way he did before the war, only _after_. His eyes have something in them that mirrors my own, but I fail to understand what it is.

"How are you, Sakura?" He asked quietly. There was something in his tone other than the coldness. Why can't I understand it?

"Okay" Came my brief reply. With a bit of my help, Kakashi Sensei stood up.

"No, Sakura, you're not, and neither am I." His face looks familiar, finally. I could barely recognize him _after_ everything, so it's good I can now. His voice isn't cold either. I guess Kakashi Sensei is right. I'm not okay, no one is right now.

"Do you...want to talk about it?" I asked. Although Kakashi Sensei is a reserve guy, a slimmer of hope washed over me, as I wish he'll talk to me. Like me, he isn't the same _after_ and there's no one else who had experienced what I went through **except** for him. We're both carrying unnecessary guilt, just so we can hold on to the remnants of our sanity. I know I need help taking it off my shoulders, and so does he. I really do want us to be okay, _after_.

"No, I don't." I practically winced at his cold tone and looked at his back as he walked away from me. What is it something I said? Yes, it was. I blamed him for his students' death. I said it in anger, I didn't mean any of it. However, I still said it and I can't take it back.


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4:**

 **Kakashi POV**

As I walked away from the training grounds, Sakura's words replayed in my mind.

'She didn't mean it. She didn't mean it. She didn't mean it.''

No matter how much I tell myself that I can't completely believe it. I know what Sakura said was in a bout of anger, but I can't help but agree with her. It's on me that Naruto and Sasuke died. I don't want my last student to be carrying the guilt of never being good enough because she is. She has been able to surpass the Fifth Hokage, Lady Tsunade in more ways than one; she should be proud of herself. Her two friends' deaths aren't her burden to carry. Their deaths were just examples of the endless cycle of hatred. Although, I'm not sure if the cycle has ended. I sure hope so.

Then why? Why am I blaming myself continuously?

'Because you could've done something.' My negative thoughts told me.

I can't help but think in a different universe, what would've happened if Naruto and Sakura gave up on Sasuke? Would Naruto and Sasuke have still died? I don't know for sure.

Well, things would be much easier, that I can tell. But then again, if they had given up on him, what would that say about their character? Would they have still become the great shinobis I seen in the war? No, they wouldn't be.

Another thought crossed my mind. What if they both have lived? In that universe, I could see the end results so clearly. Sakura heals the two stubborn ninjas, Sasuke sees and comprehends the importance of keeping bonds and Naruto achieving his dream as Hokage.

 _Hokage_

*******  
Four months later

"I'm sure it's no secret that I will step down as Hokage one of these days. And I'm also sure it's no secret that you're the next one in line." Lady Tsunade informed me in her office.

It was about noon when she called me in. I recently came back from a small mission from the Mist village. It was nothing much, just a D-rank supply mission, but I didn't mind if it got me out of the village. I don't like staying here for long, so I tried to find any excuse to leave. No one judges me, they understand. I haven't spoken to Sakura since the memorial. I'm too much of a coward to talk to her. I feel like I failed her tremendously, but I don't have the guts to tell her.

"Oh yeah, yeah," I responded offhandedly, I can't quite keep my attention in one place anymore.

Lady Tsunade sighed. "Spacing out again, huh? I guess student and teacher act alike."

I looked at her in question. How is Sakura?

As if reading my mind, the only female in the Legendary Sannin continued. "Ever since... _after_ , Sakura is always spacing out and working too many hours at the hospital. She didn't give herself some time to mourn _after_ the memorial and would work until she passes out. Her parents, Ino and I constantly order her to not overwork, but of course, in the end, she's always passing out in the hospital." She took a sip from a cup, I assumed have sake in it. That's her way of dealing with _it_. "I'm afraid if I try to stop her by force, something really bad will happen. However, my words and everyone else's had no effect on her."

She set her cup down. "This isn't a new feeling for you, Kakashi. You've experienced this type of loss before, she hasn't. I already had to deal with it from her, and I **won't** do it for you. I know the war wasn't easy to win. Sometimes it feels like we haven't won at all with the people we lost, but we…."

Lady Tsunade's words came out in a blur, as she slowly lost my attention. I'm not paying attention to much these days, time flying past. Sometimes I can't help it, but at times like these, I choose to not have any attention.

A sudden bang on the Hokage's desk from the Fifth Hokage startled me out of my thoughts.

"Are you even listening to me!" She questioned, her voice raised. "You must stop this Kakashi! It's been four months, as a shinobi, you **have** to move on!"

I don't know why, but in all of my years of keeping my cool, I finally snapped. "Move on!?" I mirrored Lady Tsunade's previous action and slammed my hands on her desk. "MOVE ON?! HOW COULD I POSSIBLY MOVE ON, WHEN I HAVE THIS-THIS UGLY, ACHING, GUILT IN ME THAT'S MORE HORRIBLE-MORE FAMISHED THAN ANY OTHER GUILT FEELINGS I HAD!? I COULD BARELY LIVE WITH IT, LET ALONE MOVE ON FROM IT!"

"WELL BOOHOO!" Yelled Tsunade. She stood up from her chair, scowling at me. "YOU KNOW, YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO LOST SOMETHING IN THAT WAR! YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONE WHO LOST _HIM_!"

"BUT I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO LOST **TWO** OUT OF MY **THREE ONLY** STUDENTS! I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO HAD AN OLD FRIEND PRESUMABLY DEAD COME BACK TO LIFE! I AM THE ONLY ONE WHOSE BEST FRIEND-"

"OH ENOUGH ALREADY! YOU LOST PEOPLE AND FACED DIFFICULT CHALLENGES JUST LIKE THE REST US! YES YOU MAY HAVE LOST THEM IN A QUICKER TIME SPAN THAN OTHERS, BUT IT'S NO GOOD WHINING ABOUT IT NOW! SO STOP ACTING LIKE-"

"Lady Tsunade!" Interrupted her aid Shizune. She was standing at the door, eyebrows furrowed with a frown on her face.

The Fifth looked away from me and towards Shizune. Taking a deep breath she says, "Yes Shizune, what is it?"

"Well, um, the Kazekage and his entourage have arrived. Is it not a good time or…"

Tsunade sighed deeply. "No, no, no, it's fine. Send them in." Her eyes looked back at mines tiredly.

I realized it would be no use arguing back and forth with the leader of the village about something we can't agree to disagree on. I bowed before her. "I apologize ma lady for my bad temperament. Please forgive me."

She sighed yet again, waving her hand in a dismissive manner. "Yeah, yeah, we'll talk about this later Kakashi. Just talk to Sakura, okay?"

Here goes that word again, _okay_.

I nod my head, despite having doubts that I could talk to my remaining student. I can't even **look** at her, let alone talk to her, but this _experience_ , this loss is new for her. It's new for a lot of people, the least I can do is grow up and face her.

The door creaked open as the visitors from the Sand walked in. I haven't seen the three Sand Siblings since _after_ , about four months ago. Although the meeting was very brief, I would forever remember the expressions on the young Kazekage's and his two older siblings faces. They wore the faces of defeat and sadness. I could practically see the darkness threatening to break out from Gaara. However, I wasn't surprised, he lost his best friend _after_ all.

This time, the Sand guests look a bit better, although it seems like they had a rough couple of months.

I bowed before them. "Greetings, Lord Kazekage." I made sure my tone was friendly and had no hint of anger it had before. I straightened myself up and met the blue-green eyes of the youngest sibling.

"Kakashi Hatake." His voice sounds much, much older and weary too. It doesn't sound like it had the first time I met him; devoid of empathy and care. However, it doesn't sound like it did when he delivered his speech to all of the shinobis at the start of the war. It sounds…...drawn out.

"What brings you three here to the Leaf?"

"Oh, we're just here for the meeting of the Five Kage. I'm sure we're the first ones here other than the Hokage." Kankuro replied.

"Five Kage meeting? Why are the Kage meeting so soon?" My stomach tightened. I can't think of any good reason for them to.

The room was silent, each of them waiting for the other to say something until one did.

Gaara cleared his throat. "We're meeting to come up with a way to honor the war heroes: Sasuke Uchiha and…" He hesitates to say the other name. It's too soon, too painful for him to say what seems like a forbidden name. His older sister puts her hand on his shoulder as a way of comfort.

"We're meeting to honor the war heroes: Sasuke Uchiha and Naruto Uzumaki." He said again, more composed and clearer this time.

"Honor?" I question. Honor the two of them? I never thought of that.

"Yes," The young Kazekage continued. "They both contributed greatly to provide a better world for all of us. Honoring them is the least we can do since they sacrificed their lives to end the cycle of hatred in the world."

Sacrifice their lives? Is that what they call it these days? I honestly can say that I never thought of their deaths as sacrifices. My thoughts were always that my carelessness and lack of strength is what killed them. However, thinking about it now, they **did** sacrifice themselves for the betterment of the world, and that makes me the happiest and proudest human alive.

I smiled genuinely, the first time _after_ , at everyone in the room. "You don't say? That's a perfect way to remember them."

Everyone looked at me like I had three heads, or I had pulled my mask off.

"Yes, yes it is," Temari said returning my smile with her own small one.

"If you want," Tsunade spoke up. "You can attend the meeting since you **are** the future Hokage."

I scratched my head and laughed nervously. I'm not prepared to be the leader of my village. I don't think I should be. "Thanks for the offer Lady Tsunade, but I think I'll just attend as an advisor of some sort."

Tsunade raised her eyebrows in surprise. "So you'll attend?"

"When is it?"

"Tomorrow at noon."

"I'll be there."

"On time?"

"Earlier," I thought about sharing the good news with a certain someone. "Lady Hokage, can Sakura attend too? They were her teammates _after_ all."

Tsunade turned towards the red-haired boy, and he nodded in response. "Well, I guess that would make sense, but make sure she gets something to eat and a decent amount of rest."

"I go do that right now," I replied. I bowed to the two Kage. "Lady Tsunade. Kazekage." And then I disappeared in a puff of smoke.

I feel hope that everything will be a somewhat decent _okay_ after all. I hope I can share this great feeling with Sakura, like her, Naruto, and Sasuke did to me a few years ago. I hope she'll get better. I hope she doesn't blame herself anymore. I hope she'll attend the Kage meeting tomorrow with me. I hope she doesn't hate me.

 _I hope_


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5:**

 **Sakura's POV**

"Sakura! Stop! You need to go home! You're overworking yourself, _again_!" My best friend, Ino said dragging me out of the hospital from my wrists.

I twisted my arms out of her grasp. "Will you quit it!? I need to go back to work!"

"No, you don't! What you **need** is to go home, and relax, rest, EAT! When was the last time you actually ate something besides patients' leftovers!?"

"That doesn't matter! What does is helping people at the hospital get better, and I can't help them if I'm at home!"

"Yes, it does matter, because your parents are really worried about you, Sakura. You're pushing them away!"

"Because they try to make me spend fewer hours at the hospital!"

"Because they care about you and don't want you to overdo it yet again! You know, you should be more appreciative when it comes to your parents! At least you have two to go home to! I wish that I have that! I wish my mom doesn't cry every night for my dad who's never coming home again! Sadly, I can't have that! But you can! You can stop your parents from worrying about if I'll bring you home with your chakra nearly depleted and you having to sleep for three straight days! You can make them sleep better at night! I'm tired of having this conversation with you over and over again Sakura!"

"Nobody told you to do that Ino." I snapped at her. "No one told you to bring me home or to watch out for me. I can do it myself!"

"I never said you couldn't."

"Then leave me alone!" I shouted. She looked at me startled, her face filled with hurt. I looked away. I feel bad for acting this way towards her; she doesn't deserve _this_. I feel bad about a lot of stuff lately. I **hate** feeling this way, work makes it better.

I expected Ino to say something else. That's how it usually went with our conversations in the recent months. She'll tell me I'm overdoing it, several words are exchange, and then finally she'll say something to ease the tension between us. Although, it doesn't solve any of our problems. It never solves anything. Still, I waited for Ino to reply, and when she didn't speak, I looked back at her. Her face had a surprised look on it. She was looking in my direction, not at me, but something behind me. I was about to turn around to see what she was looking at until a familiar voice I haven't heard in months answered my question instead.

"I'm sorry, am I interrupting something?" Kakashi Sensei asked from behind me. I froze, unsure whether or not my hearing was correct.

"No, you're not," Ino spoke up. "I was just leaving, see you later Billboard Brow." And leave she did, back to the hospital.

'Thanks a lot, Ino-Pig.'

There was silence between Kakashi Sensei and I. I don't know what to say to him, I'm too ashamed. I blamed him for something he couldn't control. Who does that? I didn't mean it, but the fact that I said it in the first place, is what got me refusing to look at him. I just hope he doesn't hate me too much.

"Do you... want to go and get a bite to eat?" He asked.

"No thanks, I'm not hungry." I lied. I know that if we go out to eat, we'll talk about what happened _after_ , but I don't want to. I want to get back to work. That's when my stomach picked the perfect time to make itself known, grumbling louder than it did ever before. I can feel my face heating up in embarrassment.

"I think you're stomach would disagree with you there. C'mon, it's my treat."

I want to decline, but I know Kakashi Sensei wouldn't take that as an answer. Besides, he said he's paying, and one thing my broke, lazy teacher has never done, was pay for his meal or anyone else's, and I'm not going to pass that up. I sighed reluctantly, before quietly saying. "Fine."

I walked a few feet behind him, as we both started walking away from the hospital. Part of me wanted to run back and bury myself in work. The other half of me felt relieved that I was getting fresh air, and that my body was given somewhat of a rest. Well, until I think about why I don't go out in the first place. It gives me free time, and free time makes me think, which leads to unpleasant thoughts I refuse to acknowledge. Maybe I shouldn't have agreed to this.

I was too busy thinking about ways I could successfully ditch Kakashi Sensei, that I didn't notice him falling into step with me.

"Do you know the Five Kage are meeting tomorrow?" He asked me.

Huh? Did he just say the Kage are meeting? Tomorrow? So soon?

"Really?" I asked, voicing one of my own thoughts.

"Yeah, I just talked to Gaara and his siblings nearly half an hour ago."

I nodded, a comfortable silence falling between us. "So, how is Gaara?" My voice sounded quieter than I expected. I haven't heard much about the leader of the Sand village, and I hope he's doing well.

"He's...uh, making it." Kakashi Sensei replied, before turning to me, smiling. "Just like the rest of us."

I looked down, still unable to meet his eyes. "It's amazing, isn't it? Even now after the whole war situation, and despite his age, Gaara is able to run a village successfully. I'm sure it's no easy job."

"Yeah, it isn't." Kakashi Sensei stopped. "We're here."

I looked up to see where he took me and froze in shock. We stopped at the food place I wanted to avoid. I felt all my feelings rush to the surface. No other food place could make me feel this emotional than Ichiraku. Ichiraku was Naruto's favorite spot to eat because ramen was his favorite food. He always came here when he wanted a bite to eat, even dragging me and the rest of Team 7 along with him. The restaurant's owner Teuchi and his daughter Ayame never held any ill will towards Naruto despite everything, and for that I'm grateful.

"Can we go somewhere else to eat?" I asked anxiously. I don't know if I can stay here without falling apart.

"Why? We always ate here before. Their food is delicious." Kakashi Sensei walked forward, holding up one of the flaps. He looked back at me and nod his head towards the restaurant. "C'mon, I know you're hungry, and remember, it's my treat."

I hesitated, not knowing if I can face perhaps two of Naruto's favorite people once again.

My stomach protested against my thoughts in running away again, I gave in. "Oh, alright." And I walked into the beloved ramen shop.

"Well, well, well, looked at what the cat drag in Ayame! We haven't seen you two in a long time!" Teuchi greeted us.

"Yeah, everything has just so been hectic since... _after_." Kakashi Sensei replied, his tone taking it down a notch.

Teuchi notices this. "Yes, everything has been hectic." His voice sounds grim now. I'm not surprised. Talking about anything related to _after_ has that effect.

"Wow, if it isn't Sakura Haruno and Kakashi Hatake!" A cheery voice sprung out to our left.

Shocked raced throughout my body, I forgot about Iruka Sensei. Judging by Kakashi Sensei's lack of response I can tell he was surprised too.

"I haven't seen you two in a while." Iruka Sensei continued with his usual smile on his face. That smile makes me feel uneasy, not to mention guilty. I could've saved his favorite student from death, but why is he smiling so brightly? Why is he smiling at all? I can't think of any good reasons to smile at all these days.

"Iruka, it's good to see you." Kakashi Sensei recovered first, giving him a slight smile that he doesn't really mean. It's funny I know this, despite him having a mask that covers most of his face.

"Why don't you guys sit down? I'm buying!"

Kakashi Sensei took a step towards the seat next to Iruka. "Well, if you're paying.."

"Oh no, you don't." I grabbed his shoulder and pushed him away slightly. I looked up at him and poke his chest. "You're not going to get out of paying for something in your life again, you cheapskate!"

Kakashi Sensei raised his hands up in surrender as Iruka Sensei chuckled behind us.

"Now Sakura" My masked teacher started. "You know I'm not trying to get out of paying for your lunch. It's just that the man offered, and I would **hate** to turn down such an appealing offer."

"That's too bad because you will." I sat down next to Iruka Sensei, mumbling, "Little cheapskate" While Kakashi Sensei sat down on my other side.

Teuchi came to us. "What are you guys ordering?"

I was just about to order some plain old ramen when Iruka Sensei answered for the three of us.

We three will have miso soup pork ramen." He turned to us. "Every time I brought ramen, my wallet usually ends up empty. It was-"

"Well now is not the time to be all nostalgic on us Iruka." Kakashi Sensei interrupted.

We all became silent as we waited for the food. I know what Iruka Sensei was going to say. Miso soup pork ramen was Naruto's favorite food. That idiot could eat it for days, for all three meal times, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I looked down at the counter, remembering all those times we went to Ichiraku. I smiled a little, we always had good times when we came here.

"So, how are you two?" Iruka Sensei asked us once we started eating.

"Eh, we're living." Kakashi Sensei answered.

I didn't realize how hungry I was until I practically inhaled the ramen; already getting seconds. Naruto had good taste.

"Woah, slow down there Sakura. The food isn't going anywhere." Iruka Sensei joked.

"Please do, it seems like you're eating a lot." Kakashi Sensei muttered looking into his wallet. "I don't know if I have enough to pay for more than **two** bowls.

"So what are you doing here Iruka Sensei?" I said once I finished my second bowl, ignoring Kakashi Sensei. I nearly facepalmed myself when my mind registered that 1) I asked a very stupid question (he's here to eat ramen of course) and 2) I'm now sitting down by someone who **should** despise me. Instead, he offered to pay for my food. My feelings of guilt caught up with me in a rush, I don't feel good. I need to get out of here.

I was thinking about excuses for me to leave when my academy teacher answered.

"What am I doing here?" He repeated, looking up in thought. "Well other than eating, I came to celebrate!" He finished up his sentence and smiled at me.

This draws a blank in my mind. "Celebrate? For what?"

"The meeting of the Five Kage tomorrow."

That information only made me more confused. "Why are the Kage meeting so soon?" It can't be something bad since Iruka Sensei thinks it's good enough to be celebrating, but for what?

I pressed on for more information. "Why are they meeting tomorrow exactly?"

He gave me a surprised look. "You didn't hear?"

"Hear what?" I could feel a bit of suspense building in me, as I wait for him to answer.

"The Kage are meet-"

"Oh, I was going to tell her the news, Iruka." Kakashi Sensei interrupted. "That's kind of why I brought her here."

This had me intrigued more than ever. "Tell me what? What is there to celebrate?" I hope it's good news. I **need** some good news.

"Well, I don't know if I should tell you now or probably wait until tomorrow." Kakashi Sensei drummed his fingers on his empty bowl in thought. A random thought occurred to me: I realized I missed another chance to see his face.

"Kakashi Sensei"

"Alright, alright, I'll tell you now." His fingers stopped as he smiled at me, our eyes finally meeting contact since the funeral. "Tomorrow, the Kage are meeting to discuss a way to honor our comrades Naruto and Sasuke."

I looked at him surprised. "They are?" I never thought that the five villages would come together to come up with a way to honor, not just Naruto but Sasuke too. Tears came up to the surface of my eyes before I started to wipe them away. "Wow, that's pretty amazing."

"I think so too." Agreed Kakashi Sensei. "It just makes me so proud to have had those two as my students. Despite them not getting along plenty of times, they have truly become strong."

I looked back at my empty bowl, a strange feeling of disappointment washing over me. But what did I expect? I couldn't save Naruto and Sasuke. I'm not strong, just weak.

As if hearing my thoughts Kakashi Sensei said, "I'm mostly proud of you, Sakura."

My head snapped back up as I turned my shock face back to him.

He continued. "It's true, you have become perhaps the strongest kunoichi I have ever seen in my lifetime. And you didn't need much of my help to get here. Although you have had your annoying moments in your earlier years, I have to say you are my favorite student."

I scoffed. "Are you saying that because I'm your only student left?"

Kakashi Sensei chuckled. "No, you became my favorite before that."

"So did I became your favorite when I had to carry you the whole way to the Final Valley?"

"You did not 'carry' me, only aided me."

"You mean I dragged you."

He ruffled my hair. "Yeah, let's go with that. What I'm trying to say is that whatever way we decide to honor those two, I think it will help us move on."

Move on? My heart beat quicken. Why would we want to move on? Why **should** we move on? The uneasy feeling in my belly came back.

"Why! I don't want to move on, I thought you don't too!" I questioned, angrily standing up. What is wrong with him?! I thought he understood. "Weren't they, your students!? You can't forget about them!How can you do this?!"

Kakashi Sensei stood up also, his hands in a surrendering position. "Sakura calm down, I wasn't saying that-"

"Then what are you saying?! It seems like you don't care!"

"That's not it-listen why don't we talk about this in private?"

"Oh, **now** you want to talk! I wanted us to talk four months ago! But you left me, standing alone...in the rain. You made me feel even more guilty about not being able to save them!" Tears formed in my eyes and were running down my face. Why am I such a crybaby? "I already felt guilty, to begin with, and **you** made it worse! No, I'm doing it again! See! I'm such a coward, blaming you for everything! I couldn't even say it until now! What is wrong with me!?" I ran out of the restaurant, quickly masking my chakra. I didn't wait for his response, I'm too afraid he'll hate me.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6:**

 **Kakashi's POV**

"Did I….said something wrong?" I asked confusedly to no one in particular. I don't get it at all. What did I say that cause her to flip out on me?

Iruka came up next to me. "Maybe she's just having a hard time adjusting."

"No, it's something more than that." I left the restaurant, racing to track down my student when I realized two things. The first one is I know what I did wrong: I told her to _move on_. Tsunade told me that just earlier today and I flipped out on her, it's no surprise Sakura would do the same thing. It does seem like I'm being a hypocrite. I'm such an idiot. However, I think we both misinterpreted what moving on really means. The second thing I realized is that I forgot to pay.

'Sorry Iruka, no hard feelings. You did say you were buying.'

I showed up to the hospital, hoping Sakura was there. It's not easy looking for her since she disguised her chakra.

I walked into the hospital searching for the pink-haired ninja when I ran into her blonde haired friend instead.

"Kakashi Sensei!" Ino greeted me. "Did you get Sakura to take some time off? I hope so because she's just been so obsessed with work recently."

'Actually, I was going to ask you if she came back here.' I thought in my mind, but I decided not to say it aloud for obvious reasons.

I scratched the back of my head sheepishly, getting ready to tell her what happened. "Well-"

"Kakashi my eternal rival!" A loud voice interrupted me.

I turned to my longtime friend Might Guy, who was coming towards us in a wheelchair being push by no other than his favorite student: Rock Lee.

In the war, Guy was seriously injured by our enemy: Madara Uchiha. Guy, a specialist in taijutsu, opened all eight gates, despite the risk of death to try and defeat the reanimated man. Regardless of the outcome, Guy was able to make it out alive. However, he is wheelchair bound.

"Guy, you're looking good today." I greeted the bowl haircut man.

"Guy Sensei! You're supposed to be in bed." Ino said angrily and then glared at Lee. "And Lee! **You** were supposed to keep him there!"

Guy laughed. "Don't blame Lee. I told him to take me out of bed. The power of youth cannot be held down!"

Ino rolled her eyes. "Where's Tenten when you need her?"

"Tenten went home to rest," Lee answered.

"Yes! It seems like she couldn't handle the hot-blooded spirit!"

Ino rolled her eyes again and turned to me. "So, how is she?"

I shifted my feet, preparing to hear the consequences of my actions from Ino. "Actually I was hoping to find her here at the hospital. You see, she kind of got upset and ran away from me."

I basically had to cover my ears as Ino screeched out in shock. "What!? WHY!? What did you do!?"

"It was a misunderstanding. She thought I meant one thing, but I was meaning the other and now I don't know where she is."

Ino put her face in her hands, shaking her head in frustration. I probably shouldn't have told her this. I can imagine she has a lot on her plate; dealing with the losses of her father and friends, trying to take care of her mother and Sakura, and working at the hospital and flower shop.

Lee placed a hand on Ino's shoulder. "Do not worry Ino, Guy Sensei and I will help Kakashi Sensei look for Sakura."

Ino scowled at Lee. "Guy Sensei isn't even supposed to leave his bed. Let alone look for Sakura! He needs to go back!"

"What?! But he is feeling fine!"

"That's okay Lee." Guy said, "I'll go back to bed, just let me speak with Kakashi for a minute."

Lee bowed. "Yes, Guy Sensei! Ino, let's give these two some room."

Ino glanced back at me before leaving, along with Lee.

I stared down at my "eternal rival". "So Guy, what is it that you want to talk about?"

His face had a serious look. "You see Kakashi, we haven't really talked _after_ the war, and we both lost our students in it." He paused to make sure I was following. "I know that despite everything, there was nothing we two could've done to prevent their deaths. However, that doesn't erase the underlying feelings of guilt we possess. It's a sick feeling that we cannot cure with just a few words. No matter how much I tell you it isn't your fault for your students' deaths, no matter how much I tell you, you did all that you could, you will not believe me unless you believe yourself. From what I heard and seen from Sakura, she thinks it's her fault too, right?"

I stood rigid, as I nod my head in confirmation.

He continued, "And I'm assuming you told her it wasn't her fault, but she doesn't believe you, right?"

Another nod.

"That's the thing with guilt, it doesn't just go away. It takes time, Sakura needs time. She needs to be able to forgive herself on her own. Once you find her, makes sure she knows this."

This is one of the times where I'm grateful to have a friend like Guy.

"Thanks, Guy," I said, "You know even when I had my sharingan back then, and still today, it seems like you're better at reading people than me."

"Well Kakashi, I guess that's another challenge I win in!" Guy said striking his nice guy pose.

"Sure, I have to go now. Make sure you go back to bed, Guy."

He laughed again. "Ha! My youthful spirit cannot conform to a bed! I thought I said that already. I have to get out sometimes, you know."

I returned Guy's smiled before I started to walk away. "See you later Guy."

"As will I! Kakashi my eternal rival! I will be waiting for our next challenge to add to my list of wins!"

I chuckled, he's still the same old Guy. "The last time I remembered, I was winning!"

He gasped.

"Wait up Kakashi Sensei!" Lee called running after me.

I stopped. "Yes, Lee?"

"I'm going with you!"

"But Guy has to go back to bed."

"Yes I know, that is why I will stand in his place, and help you search for Sakura. She is my friend _after_ all."

I guess it would be helpful to have someone else look for her with me.

"Okay Lee, let's go."

'Where can she be?' I wondered. Lee and I have been searching all over the village for Sakura but had no luck.

I stood back at the hospital, waiting for Lee to hear if he had any clues to her whereabouts.

"Kakashi Sensei!" Guy's student called out to me.

"Yes Lee, have you found her?"

"No, I did not. I am sorry Kakashi Sensei. I searched all over the village and ask around without any clues."

'If she isn't here then where is she?' As the thought entered my mind, I knew where she was. Of course, she'll be there, she knows that would be the last place I'll look. It's the last place where I **want** to look.

I patted Lee on the shoulder. "Thanks for your help Lee, but I think I got it from here."

"Do you know where she is Kakashi Sensei?!"

I shrugged. "I might,"

"Then I'll go along with you!"

"No Lee, I need to go there alone. We have some things we need to discuss."

"Oh, I understand. Then I'll go back to Guy Sensei and wait for your results."

"You go do that Lee." I watched Lee run back to the hospital.

'Why is he running? The hospital isn't going anywhere.' Upon thinking that, I started to think, 'What if that were Sasuke and Naruto in the hospital?' I know for a fact that Sakura and I would be running to the hospital every day to check up on them in a heartbeat.

 _'What if'_

I shook my head and started my way towards where I expected my pink-haired student to be.

'What if it's too late?'

I begin to run to the Final Valley. No, it **won't** be too late.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7:**

 **Sakura's POV**

It's the first time I've been back to the Final Valley since _after_. Everything, from the broken statues to the waterfall, looks pretty much the same except Naruto and Sasuke are gone. A pang of guilt and pain arose in my chest. Who knew pain hurts this much. I remember the first time I felt this way; it was when Sasuke was leaving the village. It feels like a thousand of years ago that had happened, but in reality, it was only around three to four years ago. I remembered pleading to him with all that I have had, to forget about his revenge quest to kill his brother Itachi Uchiha. Back then, I didn't know what I was asking him to do. I was basically asking him to forget about all the pain his older brother have caused him in exchange for only my love. I was naive, and I still was when I pleaded with him again in the war. I was able to comprehend more of his actions both good and bad, but I failed to comprehend that my love wasn't enough for him. Another stab in my heart, if _only_ my love was enough for him.

Sasuke always seemed like the cool type, knowing what he wanted and being a pro at almost everything. In the beginning, that was why I liked him. It wasn't until _after_ we went on our first mission, the chunin exams, and when he left the village, I realized that my feelings for him ran deeper than what he had on the surface. It was an unknowing habit I picked up when time passed by. The habit of thinking where was he, was he " _okay"_ as a whole, was he happy. I thought he would be happy after killing Itachi, but then again, who would be happy _after_ getting their whole clan killed? Sure, he got his revenge, but it didn't fill the hole in his heart that I feel right now.

This brings me to Leaf's number one hyperactive ninja. Naruto was always there for me, even when I didn't reciprocate his feelings, but I knew he didn't love me in that romantic nature. He began to feel more like a brother to me near the end. Naruto was able to understand Sasuke from early on, feeling the same pain he felt as life progressed. I was jealous of Naruto before because it always seems like his words got through to Sasuke somewhat. I was naive to be jealous, he didn't want to feel that way, treated like an outsider in his own village. Naruto always thought mostly positive in every type of situation, despite what was given to him. However, he was always so dense practically about everything.

I jumped down landing next to some random debris and walked around the area.

Kakashi Sensei's words rang in my mind. "It's _true, you have become perhaps the strongest kunoichi I have ever seen in my lifetime."_

Did Kakashi Sensei really mean it? Am I strong? If so, why wasn't I able to do anything that could've saved my two teammates?

 _"Although you have had your annoying moments in your earlier years, I have to say you are my favorite student."_

I knew he was telling me the truth when he said those words to me genuinely. I was **pretty** annoying back then, being obsessed with a future rogue criminal. At that moment I would've believed anything that lazy, silver tongue has said.

 _"What I'm trying to say is that whatever way we decide to honor those two, I think it will help us move on."_

I kicked at a loose rock. This is the part I don't get. I thought Team 7 was like a family, not to just me but to Kakashi Sensei too. So why would he want us to move on? Who's going to remember Naruto and Sasuke if we don't?

I sat down on the two statue hands that connect. This is where they died at. Both fighting for what they believed in. Both wanting the shinobi world to be a better place than the one they were forced to live in. Both had dark moments in their lives, but in the end, I hope they're remembered as not a jinchurki and an Uchiha, but as Naruto and Sasuke. I laid down on top of the statues. The rock is very uncomfortable underneath.

I don't know if anyone understands how much those two mean to me. Ever since Sasuke's departure to the Sound, I always wanted to get better for the two of them. In the war, when I fought side by side with Naruto and Sasuke, I felt like my hard work for the past three years had finally paid off. I thought that was my ultimate test in where I got to show my true strength to everyone who had constantly doubted me or thought I needed protection. I thought wrong. My real ultimate test wasn't a test of my strength, but a test on my reliability. I never failed a test in my life, or at least I thought I didn't. However, come to think of it, life gave me many tests other than the ones on paper. I passed some...and then I failed some.

As I gaze up at the sky, I noticed a brown bird- a hawk circling around the area. For some reason, I feel a strange comfort watching it. A small smile came to my lips, but I don't know why I would smile at a random bird flying. I closed my eyes, thinking about the hawk, not realizing I was drifting off to sleep.

 ** _Dream:_**

 _I jumped down to the debris running to heal my two teammates. They looked seriously injured. One of each of their arms were red and destroyed from their fight. For a split second, I panicked, wondering if they were alive or not._

 _"Sakura!" Naruto's cheery voice greeted me._

 _I sighed in relief, they were alive. I made it in time._

 _I immediately begin my medical ninjutsu. Naruto thanked me and was smiling more than ever, he finally got his best friend back. Sasuke stayed silent as I healed him, until…_

 _"Sakura...I.." Sasuke began, but I cut him off._

 _"Just shut up for now. I'm concentrating." I said. I don't know what he's trying to say, but I have to focus on healing these two so they can be stable enough to be treated at the hospital in Konoha._

 _He didn't listen to me. "I'm sorry…"_

 _This caught my attention, my heartbeat quickened. "Sorry? For what?" I really should be focus on healing them, but he just won't stop talking. How unlike him._

 _"...For everything up till now."_

 _What did he just say? Sorry? Does he know how much pain I've gone through by loving him? By not letting him go? He did so many horrible things to everyone around him, the_ _ **least**_ _he could do is say that he's sorry._

 _"You'd better...geez" I feel my tears welling up and coming out of my eyes. He could be so random at times._

 _I closed my eyes, realizing how much I miss him. How much I miss the way things use to be. He caused me to care so much about him, making not just me, but Naruto and Kakashi Sensei go to great lengths to get him back. He's so stupid, he's such a troublemaker._

 _I voiced my thoughts. "You are so much trouble...Stupid."_

I was having a pleasant dream until I felt someone slightly shaking me awake.

I heard someone called my name in a low voice.

"Sakura,"

'Is that Sasuke? Or Naruto?' I wondered, thinking that everything that I dreamt was true. Are my two friends alive _after_ all? Were they dying from an alternate universe? I opened my eyes quickly, hoping that their deaths were an illusion and either Naruto or Sasuke was trying to wake me up.

Instead, it was Kakashi Sensei.

Immediate disappointment filled me. I forgot that was all a dream. I forgot I didn't save them. How silly of me.

I sat up and looked around to see if there was anyone else with Kakashi Sensei.

"I came alone." He said. "We need to talk." He sat down beside me.

I want to move away from him, but I feel too drain. I looked down at my hands, giving him the silent treatment.

He noticed this. "Please Sakura, I need you to understand. I think I wasn't clear enough earlier."

I turned to him. "You wasn't clear that you wanted to move on from Naruto and Sasuke?" He winced at my harsh tone.

"Moving on isn't a bad thing."

"Yeah, it just says you're ready to forget about someone." I sarcastically responded.

"That's not what it means."

I feel so tired, I hardly had any sleep in the past four months other than my short nap and passing out from overworking in the hospital. "Then what does it mean Kakashi Sensei? I'm barely holding on as is, I don't know about anything anymore."

I looked in his eyes and noticed that just like at the training grounds on the day of the memorial, his eyes have something that mirrors mines. Before, I didn't know what it was, until now. It's guilt. His eyes are screaming out for help, just like mines. I never saw Kakashi Sensei so vulnerable.

"I'm trying alright?" His voice seems a bit shaken. " I thought the same thing like you at first. When Lady Tsunade told me just earlier today, that it was time to move on because it's what _we_ do; I thought she meant to forget about them. I couldn't do that, and so I freaked out on her. It wasn't until Gaara told me that the Five Kage are meeting tomorrow to discuss a way to pay tribute to Naruto and Sasuke, that I realized moving on isn't forgetting about those you loved. Moving on means being able to put your deceased loved ones in a special place in your heart where it won't cause you any pain to think about them. It's very hard to move on, many people are consumed with the pain and the loss of their loved ones, that they **can't** move on because it's what keeps them alive. It's now time for us to move on and go live a life the dead would approve of, but we can't go on living if we're drowning in guilt. I need you to forgive yourself."

A long moment of silence fallen between us. Is that what moving on really means? It seems simple enough until the task comes into play. Tears gathered in my eyes the more I looked at Kakashi Sensei. He's been hurting so much; two of his students dead, and his remaining student constantly blaming him for it. Now here he is trying to comfort me again, his face showing desperate hope that I can, that I **will** understand.

My voice came out a whisper. "I-I don't know if I can..forgive myself."

Relief floods into his face, and he smiled slightly, a tear escaping his right eye. "That's _okay_ as long as you try to Sakura. That is what matters the most."

"It isn't your fault Kakashi Sensei."

"It isn't yours either, but we won't listen to each other. It's better to blame someone like ourselves for our pain because we choose not to believe that their deaths were out of our hands. It just takes...time."

I smiled a little looking down. Finally, I was given an answer to why I feel this way. I'm glad I found somewhat of a way out. Though it doesn't destroy the lingering doubts I have about myself. Kakashi Sensei is right, I do need time.

Another long silence passed between us, this time more comfortable than the last.

I looked up. "I think I need some time away from the village." I decided looking at what appears to be the same hawk from earlier. "To gather my thoughts and find myself again. Find a way to pay tribute to Naruto and Sasuke in my own style."

"So like a rediscovery journey, that's good. When are you thinking about leaving?"

"As soon as possible."

"The Five Kage meets tomorrow at noon to discuss how to commemorate Naruto and Sasuke. Would you like to attend? I would appreciate it if you can."

"Um...sure, it would be nice to be involved in that, but make sure you arrive on time. It's a very important event."

Kakashi Sensei smiled. "Well maybe for just this event I can be only...40 minutes late?"

" **Only** 40 minutes?"

"Should I be later?"

"No! Kakashi Sensei, you can't be **more** than 40 minutes late!"

"I was before."

"But this is different. You know that."

"Fine, I'll be 30 minutes late."

"Kakashi Sensei! You can't come late at **all**!"

He chuckled. "Oh alright."

I laughed with him, the first time I laughed since _after_.

"So I heard Lady Tsunade is expecting you to step up soon and become the sixth Hokage," I said.

Kakashi Sensei sighed. "Well you know being Hokage isn't really my style."

"Why not?"

"Have you met me? With all the duties the Hokage has to perform, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy." He joked as he stood up. "You want to go back?" I notice he didn't answer my question honestly, but that's _okay_. He can answer it another day.

I got up when all a sudden, I felt a rush of dizziness and almost fell forward. I grabbed Kakashi Sensei's shoulder for support.

"Are you alright Sakura?" He asked me.

"Oh yeah, I just feel….exhausted."

"With all those hours at the hospital, I'm not surprised. Let me return the favor from four months ago and carry **you** back to the village."

Sleepiness starts to take over me. "You sure you're able to carry me the whole way? I'm about to pass out, so all I am going to be is dead weight."

Kakashi Sensei chuckled. "I was the same way the last time we were here."

"Yeah, but you helped a little," I mumbled before slipping away into oblivion.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8:**

 **Kakashi's POV**

 **Three** days, Sakura slept for **three** days, missing the Kage meeting. Ino said Sakura caused a bit of havoc once she woke up, a day ago; angry at herself that she missed an important event. She was also mad at anyone she laid her eyes on, demanding why they didn't wake her up.

 **Flashback**

 _It was around ten in the morning, a day after Sakura's and I's conversation at the Final Valley. The Five Kage meets today, and I decided to visit Sakura to see if she still wanted to attend. I walked up to her house. I didn't know if I should bring a present to her or not. Do people bring presents to others when a person is in bed for chakra depletion? When I was in the hospital for not just chakra depletion but the overuse of the mangekyou sharingan, no one brought_ _ **me**_ _any presents. Come to think of it, my own team replaced me and went on a mission without me. I looked down at the food pills I planned to give to Sakura. She'll be alright if she doesn't get anything from me. That teaches her for overworking, she knows better. I knocked on the Haruno's residence._

 _A few seconds later Sakura's mother opened the door. "Oh Kakashi Hatake, I haven't seen you in awhile."_

 _"Well, I've been busy with a few things. I came by to make sure Sakura is still coming to the meeting of the Five Kage."_

 _"Is that today?"_

 _"Yes,"_

 _"She can't attend. Ino stopped by earlier today and said Sakura will be passed out for a couple of days. I told her to stop working so much."_

 _"Oh, that's not good. Thank you for your time." I began to walk away when I remembered the food pills in the bag I was holding. Sai have given them to me when I brought Sakura back to the village yesterday. He said he made the food pills himself and was hoping Sakura could be his test subject and try them out. I guess I can punish her by giving her Sai's food pills. I'm not sure if he's good at cooking or not. "Can you give this to Sakura when she gets up?" I gave the bag to Mrs. Haruno._

 _Mrs. Haruno looked into the bag. "What is it."_

 _"Food pills, to give her strength."_

 _"Well, how nice of you! But she really doesn't deserve anything. She doesn't listen to anyone and makes them worried every second of the day."_

 _"Please, I insist." Hopefully, she likes the pills, but I think Sai made them more as a payback for her since she forced him to eat her (disgusting) food pills. Probably waiting for the right time to give them to her. He picked the perfect time._

 _"Alright." Mrs. Haruno closed the bag. "Thank you, I'll tell her you stopped by."_

I stood at the front gates of Konoha and looked up at the sky, the sun was at its highest point, indicating that it was noon.

'Where is she? She's supposed to be here.' I casually survey the area. 'Didn't she said to be here at noon?' That's when I caught the sight of her.

"Wow Kakashi Sensei, you're actually on time for something." Sakura joked.

"You said it was important." I noticed she was carrying a backpack. "Leaving so soon? Didn't you just woke up from a three-day coma a day ago?"

"I told you I wanted to leave as soon as possible."

"Well yeah, but I didn't know you meant to leave so soon."

"Thanks to Sai's "revenge food pills" I'm able to. They were delicious."

I cursed Sai silently. Making a mental note to never get anyone any 'get well' gifts again. His/our plan backfired.

"Have you told anyone that you're leaving?" I asked.

Tsunade's student shifted her feet, glancing off to the side. "Yes, but not all of them approve. Actually, I can't think of anyone who does. I don't blame them, I've been distant with everyone and then one day I tell them that I'm leaving for the village for who knows how long."

"If I didn't know any better, I would say Sasuke influenced your decision."

She laughed. "You know both him and Naruto did. Speaking of, what way did the Five Kage decide to honor them?"

"They're planning on replacing the Madara Uchiha and Hashirama Senju statues at the Final Valley with Naruto and Sasuke statues."

She looked at me in surprised. "Really? I know their tribute would be a grand gesture, but I didn't know it would be that."

"Pretty good idea, huh?"

"Was it yours?"

I shrugged. "I may have had an idea."

Sakura smiled and looked at the sky. She gave it a funny look.

"What?" I asked and looked at the sky too. It was a clear less, with only a brown bird flying by.

"I keep on seeing that same bird."

"What makes you think it's the same bird?"

Her smile grew wider, and she shrugged. "I don't know, it **feels** like the same one."

"Does it mean something to you?"

Sakura looked down at her hands, a blush forming on her face. "Well, I don't know. It's kind of silly, but for some reason…. I always think about Sasuke when I see it." She shook her head. "Anyway, when are they planning on building the statues?"

"Pretty soon, I didn't stay for the details."

She rolled her eyes in a playful manner. "Only you would do that."

The hint of her blush was still on her cheeks. As a kid, she always blushed when talking about Sasuke. Some things never change. She constantly cared deeply for him, even when he left, he still had an influence on Sakura. Sadly, Sasuke had never really returned her affections. However, I believe that there was something in his "ice cold" heart that did reciprocate her feelings.

"You know, I think deep in his heart, Sasuke really did love you," I told Sakura.

She looked at me in shock. "Why? Why would you say that?"

"Because it's true, I know it is."

Sakura turned away, tears forming in her eyes. "Then why?" Her voice came out in a whisper. "Why did he left? Why didn't he come back? Why couldn't he just listen to me when I told him I…" Her voice was breaking, she took a deep breath. "He told me I was annoying **three** times, I get it the first time. I lacked empathy for Naruto's situation, but then the other two times was when I pleaded with him to stay because I **love** him. Why would he toss that confession to the side like it was nothing?"

I thought about the first time I spied on Team 7 to see how their personalities were in general. I remembered Naruto transformed into Sasuke before leaving off to go the bathroom for drinking spoiled milk. When Sakura was alone with Sasuke she did indeed list Naruto's faults and blame it on him being an orphan. Sasuke seemed riled up upon hearing this and called her annoying. I wasn't there for the second time he called her that, but I was there for the third. Sakura declared her love for him with every ounce of her being and begged him to stay instead of going off to fight Naruto. In return, he told her again that she was annoying, but this time with a smirk. That's when he put her in a genjutsu. That moment wasn't my proudest as a teacher or a person because I couldn't stop him either. However, there's something in the back of my mind that makes me think Sasuke didn't mean what he said the last time.

"Maybe," I suggested, "You got under his skin, made him care about someone else other than himself. Despite him being highly antisocial, I think you and Naruto got through to Sasuke ."

She opened her mouth to say something, but no words came out. She closed it.

A silence passed between us.

"Hey," I said raising the book I've been holding in my hand towards her. "Since you're leaving, I was planning on giving you this book by Jiraiya-"

Sakura interrupted me. "Oh, no, no, no, **NO**! You do not give me a book by that old perverted man! Ew Kakashi Sensei! I thought **YOU** was better! You weird, secretly perverted- "

"Wait! Sakura! It's not what you think!" I quickly said before she could damage more of my dignity. "This book is his first. It's a tale about a gutsy ninja having to fight the dangers of the world. I think you'll like it, I know I did."

'Great, I lost respect from my only student.'

She took the book from me and gasp slightly. "It's called... _Naruto_ " she whispered. She looked at me, a tear escaping her right eye. "Sorry I called you-"

I waved my hands in a dismissive manner. "Don't worry about it. Just **please** don't say it again, I have a reputation to hold up after all."

"Right, like you don't read any inappropriate books out in public."

"Exactly,"

"Even with your flaws, I think you'll be a great Hokage."

That's when Sakura hug me. I was caught off guard, unsure if she fell into me or was actually hugging me. The feeling is so foreign.

"Thank you, Kakashi." She whispered in my ear. "You **better** become Hokage, or **I will hurt you**."

I froze, she was dead serious. Not only did she threaten me, but she also called me just Kakashi, indicating she doesn't care who I am; if I don't listen to her, I will be eating through a straw for the next couple months. My, my she **is** Tsunade's student.

"Actually, I don't know if I'm cut out for the job," I admitted.

She stopped hugging me, took a few steps back, and gave me a stern look. "Kakashi Sensei, you are _perfect_ for the job. You carry Naruto's and so many other people's Will of Fire in you. This is **your** way of honoring."

I thought about everyone I lost throughout the years, Naruto, Sasuke, Obito, Rin, Minato Sensei, my father, etc. She's right, I **am** carrying their Will of Fire.

"Are you sure you want to leave so soon?" I asked Sakura. "Maybe you should wait to leave for a few more months."

She shook her head. "No, I need to leave. If I don't do this now, I'm not sure if I'll be able to do it in the future."

"Do you know where you're headed?"

"I'm going to roam around the earth, and see what so many people sacrifice their lives for."

"Everyone is going to be giving you an earful once you come back."

Sakura shrugged, "It will be worth it."

She started to walk out of the gates, when I said, "How do I know you're coming back?"

She turned to me and gave me a look. "You know I'll be back."

"But not everyone is me. What will I tell them, what will I show them to prove that you're coming back?"

"What you'll show them?" Sakura went into her bag and pulled something out, walking back to me. "Here, show them this, because I **will** come back for it."

She put two items into in my hand: Naruto's and Sasuke's headbands.

"I forgot about these."

"I won't, so I'm expecting these back when I come home."

"No problem, remember what I said Sakura."

She nods her head. "I'll never forget it, and make sure you remember what **I** said too."

I thought about our conversations from today, the Final Valley, and other times. I'll never forget any of them.

"See you later Kakashi Sensei." Sakura waved to me, walking away.

"See you around Sakura."

I watched her as she slowly walked away from the place we call home. I hope-no, I know she'll finally be okay _after_ , eventually with time.

Just like me.

 **THE END**


	9. Chapter 9

**EPILOGUE: 8 Months Later**

 **Kakashi's POV**

It's a bright and sunny day on October 10th, Naruto's birthday and also his and Sasuke's one year death anniversary. Everyone from all parts of the world is coming to the Final Valley to pay their respect for the two war heroes. As planned, my two students have statues built at the Final Valley in their honor, replacing Hashirama and Madara. The recently built monuments look gorgeous, they're about the same size as the previous ones and were built with the same rock. However, unlike the statutes of the old generation, we all came to a decision for Naruto and Sasuke to make the seal of reconciliation. There is no doubt in anyone's mind that the two seventeen-year-olds have found peace with one another. It was difficult of course, to have two of their hands connect without interfering with the waterfall, but somehow the Stone Village managed to solve our dilemma. Another difficulty: their faces. Would they smile or be serious? Approximately how far away were Naruto's whiskers from each other? What about including Sasuke's rinnegan, should his eyes be left alone or not? In the end, we decided to add the rinnegan on Sasuke's face and include one of his infamous and rare smirks. On Naruto's face, he has a closed lip smile instead of his usual million watt one. The clothes they're wearing are the same ones they worn when they died; Naruto wearing his regular jumpsuit with his forehead protector and Sasuke, a short sleeve zippered shirt with the Uchiha crest on his back and a obi wrap around his waist.

Yes, they were beautifully built, albeit I can't help wishing they weren't built. I wish to have Naruto's face on the Hokage monument instead. Speaking of the Hokage monument, my head was just finished a few days ago, signifying that I am the next Hokage in line. Despite being given a deadly threat from my only female student, I was still very reluctant to take on the role as the village's leader. I had no more sharingan, I couldn't save two of my students and my last one left the village for some time; I couldn't help but think I couldn't protect the village. Not to mention my laid back personality will collide horribly with the Hokage routine. That's until I visited the Land of Waves a few months ago to ensure their secret aircraft goes into the skies without any difficulties when I realized that despite whoever I am now, I must embrace my duty as Hokage for the future. I willingly accepted my position as the village's leader and was shadowing under Tsunade as soon as I got back to the village.

I scanned the Final Valley. Numerous of people from many places are here to pay their respect. The guests range from belonging to big villages like the Sand, to the small ones like the Grass. There's no set dress code for the memorial, but a number of them are wearing dark formal. However, the people who were close to Naruto and Sasuke (like me) chose to wear casual or mission clothes; seeing that the two deceased shinobi (mainly Naruto) wouldn't like people dressing so grimly for them. Everyone is doing a bit better from last year, getting use to the new "normal". Besides a couple of letters, I haven't had much contact with a certain pink haired kunoichi ever since she left eight months ago. At first, her friends, family, and Tsunade freaked out when I informed them that she actually left the village. All of them wanted her to be brought back immediately.

 **Flashback**

 _"Are you crazy Kakashi?!" Tsunade nearly yelled at me in her office. "You just_ _ **let**_ _Sakura go? Did you even_ _ **try**_ _to convince her to stay!"_

 _"I'm sorry Lady Tsunade," I responded, "But I think she needs some time away from the village. I don't think she could've handled being here one more day, hence why she left so abruptly. I asked if she really wanted to leave, and she told me yes. This is good for her."_

 _The fifth Hokage shook her head. "What if she doesn't come back Kakashi? Will you say that to her distraught parents, who she left in the dark about her whereabouts?!"_

 _"Lady Tsunade, I'm pretty sure she doesn't know_ _ **herself**_ _where she is going, but it's a self-discovery mission. She'll come back when she knows herself again. It just takes time, you know this."_

 _"NO! She c-can't just leave here, only briefly warning her parents, you and no one else! It's too soon to leave the village!" I could see behind the anger in the blonde haired woman, there was great sadness that yet another person close to her has left her life without her permission. I don't blame her for yelling at me, I would do the same thing in her shoes._

 _The female Hokage looked down, a tear escaping her left eye. "Bring her back Kakashi, do whatever it takes." Her voice sounded tired._

 _I spoke to her softly. "You know I can't do that Lady Hokage. Please, give her time."_

 _The brown eyed woman turned around in her chair, looking at the view the Hokage's office provides. "They won't be happy." She said calmly, referring to her student's parents and friends. "They'll look for her themselves."_

 _"She won't forgive any of us if we don't respect her wishes."_

 _She poured some sake in her empty cup. "You think she's doing this to torture us?"_

 _"I highly doubt it."_

 _I watched Tsunade down her cup of sake. "Well, when she comes back, she'll get it for sure."_

"Lost in thought Kakashi Sensei? Or should I say Lord Hokage?" A voice called from being me. I turned around and happiness surged throughout my body.

"Sakura," I breathed out, not quite believing my eyes.

In the eight months since she's been away, Sakura's hair grown maybe around three inches past her shoulders. It seems like her bangs have grown as well and are tuck behind both her ears. The green diamond on her forehead filled with reserve chakra shows off proudly. Her headband still lays on top of her head, although her clothes have changed. She isn't wearing a pink top with a pair of black shorts under a pink skirt anymore. Now, her outfit consists of a sleeveless red qipao dress that reaches her upper thighs, with white trimmings and tied with a black obi. She still wears black shorts underneath her dress and black gloves.

"You're hair grew," I told Sakura, it's the only thing I can I think of at the moment. I wasn't really expecting her to be back here so soon, she hasn't told me she was coming back.

She looked down at her hair and held a piece of it between her hand. "Yeah, it seems so. I haven't really noticed, to be honest. I guess with not much conflict in the world like before, I just didn't feel the need to cut it. Well, I'm going to be cutting it anyways since I'm back." She looked at me and pointed towards my vest. "Is that the new standard issue vest?"

I followed her finger towards my new uniform. "Yeah, we got them a few months back."

"Last time I was here, they couldn't decide on what design. I'm glad they decided to keep the color. Anyways, congratulations, I heard you're finally going to get inaugurated as Hokage soon." Sakura laughed, "You know, I bet if Naruto was here, he'll be so confused with your new position. He'll wonder if he should call you Sensei or Lord Hokage or both."

I laughed with her because that's something Naruto would have done. "Actually, I was supposed to be sworn in today, but I wanted to be here instead. I wasn't expecting you to come back on this day Sakura. I figured you'll probably want to be alone."

"Like you?" She guessed, her face grew serious.

I gazed at the two statues, my smile fading away, the pain of losing both of them still aches, although it's a bit better now. I wanted to be alone today remembering the jinchuuriki and Uchiha, but I couldn't bring myself **not** to come out here. I didn't want to confirm what she said was right. How is she able to read my mind? Our eyes met and I realized she couldn't bring herself to be away either. My, my, student and teacher **do** think alike.

"I know what I want to do to honor Sasuke and Naruto," Sakura said, peaking my interest. "I was thinking about creating a clinic within the hospital in Konoha for treating kids' mental health. Not many people care about what the effects of war have had on children, and I want to be able to change that. I think….if Sasuke and Naruto have had something like that in their childhood, someone to talk to about their problems, someone who actually cares about their well-being; I think they would've been better off."

I couldn't help but agree with the intelligent kunoichi. That is perhaps the best idea I ever heard. A program that aids children's mental health.

I smiled at her. "Well Haruno, that sounds like an excellent idea. Good thing I'm basically the Hokage, so I'll help you out every step of the way."

She returned my smile. "Thank you Kakashi Sensei, that really means a lot to me."

"Have you told anyone else yet?"

"Not really, you're the first one I told, but I can't wait to tell the others."

"So you're coming back to the village?"

"Yes, I miss home."

"You do know that once you come back, no one will want you to leave for a long time including me, right?" I joked.

She laughed, "Yeah, I'm ready for it. Besides, I'm pretty sure someone is going to spot me very soon anyways."

Just as the sentence flew out of Sakura's mouth, a voice confirmed her assumption.

"BILLBOARD BROW! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN!?" Ino angrily yelled racing towards us. Before any of us could say anything, the blonde hugged her best friend tightly, tears running down her face. "Don't you ever leave out of nowhere like that again!" She pulled away, anger returning to her eyes. "Do you know how worried we all were! You just left and didn't even contact us!"

Sakura nodded her head in acknowledgment. "I know, I apologize Ino. I shouldn't have put you guys in that position."

Ino studied her friend's face. "You're going to have to do better than just an apology Billboard Brow. You'll have to make up for it, especially with Lady Tsunade. And you!" She pointed at me, scowling. "How dare you let her leave! You may be the sixth Hokage tomorrow, but that doesn't mean I can't kick you sorry, little-"

"I get it." I interrupted her, not feeling like hearing the rest of her threat. "I thought we made amends earlier."

"Hmph" She turned back to Sakura. "Where have you been all this time?"

"I've been around the world, seeing the effects of the war. I'll tell you later about it." Sakura replied.

"You better not leave again without warning. You hear me Sakura?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, Ino pig," She glanced at me before looking at the monuments. "I'm not going anywhere."

 **End of Epilogue**


End file.
